


Lie

by trashyeggroll



Category: Terminator (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Character Study, F/F, Femslash, Ficlet, Requests, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-13
Updated: 2020-03-13
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:40:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23124145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trashyeggroll/pseuds/trashyeggroll
Summary: Commander Dani Ramos struggles with what, and how much, to tell Grace Harper about the mission to stop the time-jumping REV-9.
Relationships: Grace Harper/Dani Ramos
Comments: 8
Kudos: 64





	Lie

**Author's Note:**

> One Word Prompt from anon: [Lie](https://trashyeggroll.tumblr.com/post/612359458832646144/prompt-me-as-hard-as-you-want-and-yeah-im)
> 
> This version slightly upgraded from the tumblr one.

There was never quiet, anymore.

Dani Ramos remembered the concept well. Quiet nights walking home from the factory, long after Diego had punched his card. She remembered the stillness of her apartment complex, sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in the misty morning hours. The way the rural expanses of road around her hometown seemed like another world, contrasted against the gleaming machinery of the auto plant.

But after Judgment Day, a truly new world emerged, and Dani wondered if she’d ever know that peace again. Legion never slept, and even if they weren’t aware of the Resistance’s exact locations, the Terminators and their ships were constantly roaring across the sky, with no need for subtlety. They were the dominant sentients in this world, after all. Explosions and the subsequent earthquakes from Legion’s quest for metals to replenish its armies were nearly as constant, whether shaking debris loose from walls or just a low, distant rumble. And on the worst days and nights, the notes between the battles were filled with the sounds of _human_ suffering, pain and hunger and grief alike.

Tonight, Dani almost felt like joining them in the plaintive groans and wails. The day had been as loss-filled as any other, but there was also a rare win. It’d been a long time coming, hanging over the Commander’s head like a guillotine blade… Well, not exactly over Dani’s head.

She was sitting near the fire in her quarters at Resistance Base 473. They had safe areas all around the region, but never stayed in them for more than one night, to avoid a large-scale attack. In 473, which was mostly underground in old subway tunnels, Dani took rare advantage of her position for the private space, which looked to have been some sort of control room in a past life. It had a table, the fireplace, and a straw mattress piled with thick wool blankets… currently draped over the impossibly tall, sleeping form of Grace, whose feet were endearingly sticking out of the covers and touching the floor. She didn’t sleep often, after the augmentation procedure, and so Dani was watching her from her chair, enjoying the rare sight of Grace’s delicate features when her guard was completely down. 

For years, Dani had managed to avoid telling Grace about the crisscrossing timelines. She knew that the Grace who’d shown up to save her life before Judgment Day was somewhere in her twenties, and augmented. So in her desperation to keep Grace safe, Dani had tried to stop her from joining the engineering division. She’d tried to keep her away from combat, to put as many barriers between Grace and herself as she possibly could… but just as dauntless as she was in the face of a REV-9, she was unstoppably dedicated to the Commander, and to the Resistance. And no other fighter, no matter how desperately Dani wanted them to succeed, had shown that they had what it took to be the Protector. Most of those whom Dani had even begun to hope could be sent back had quickly been killed, in fact, and she'd stopped cursing them with her direct mentorship.

The sleeping Grace sighed and rolled to her side, the blankets falling away from her pale shoulder and exposing the even-paler scars from her augmentation. Technically speaking, she had already died once for Dani, whose whole plan to trick destiny had fallen to pieces when she took that head injury. The rest… seemed inevitable now. Sand falling through her fingers. Earlier that day, she'd received a missive that the time travel device was ready to go. Once Legion caught up and sent a REV-9 back, they would be able to send a Protector through after it. 

And the prospect of it all threatened to hurt worse than the first time, when Grace had been a stoic stranger who’d dropped out of the sky just when Dani’s world got turned upside-down. This time, Dani had had the opportunity to see the way those blue eyes lit up with joy, the crew joking together over dinner, and memorized the stutter of her high laugh. Instead of a coarse, singularly focused Grace, Dani knew what the blonde was like when she was well-rested and feeling _hope_. Together, they’d suffered meager victories and deep losses, and Dani had never trusted a human being, other than her father and brother, as much as she trusted Grace in all things. 

When she’d woken up from her head injury, confused and hurting, Grace hadn’t been there, and the disappointment and fear that stabbed at her heart had been almost enough to knock her out again. Eventually, she glared at the doctor long enough to be told about the crash, the battle to bring Dani to safety, and the augmentation. Weeks passed before they were well enough to regroup with the main forces, and several more days before they encountered each other. The Commander had unleashed on Grace the moment they were alone, so overcome with a grief she didn't want to accept that Dani didn’t quite remember exactly what she said, in either English or Spanish, but the message had been clear: _I didn’t want this for you._

The newly-enhanced Grace, of course, had stood at attention, spine straight, and weathered every word without flinching, until Dani demanded, angry fists landing on shoulders as hard as steel, to know _why?_

“Because protecting humanity is my duty. Part of that means protecting you,” Grace had said, quietly. “And _nobody_ is going to protect you like I do. Tell me I'm wrong.”

“Morales, Dinh, Ahmed—I have the best fighters in my unit. It doesn't _all_ have to fall to you.”

“Would you have rather I died that day?”

There was a heavy, dark moment where Dani almost said _yes_. For Grace to find peace, before the suffering that lay in wait. For Dani to not have to make that choice, when the time came, and send Grace to a third death. But the most human part of her, the messy, selfish bits of being a _person_ that they were fighting to save from Legion’s machine coldness… wanted as much time with Grace as she could get. As much _of_ Grace as she could get.

She also didn’t quite remember who leaned forward first, but Dani was suddenly giving in to even more of her _mortal_ feelings, rocking up on her tiptoes as Grace’s arms folded over her waist, and their lips connected. Grace's mouth was warm and soft, tinged with the taste of metal. But it felt _so_ good to give in, after all the worry and fear and self-inflicted withholding, and it wasn’t long before she was panting against Grace’s mouth, pulling at the buckles of her uniform, impatient and near-frantic at the feel of Grace’s tongue licking into her mouth, the strong hands lifting her cleanly off the floor to press the Commander into the wall, with one of Grace’s knees pushing between her legs.

They’d managed to keep their subsequent late-night “meetings” mostly quiet, if for no other reason than to not be a distraction to their operation, but before long, and without Dani ever really noticing, Grace was sleeping in the same bed with her almost every night, and Dani… Dani hated how much she’d come to find solace in it. Not just the physical activity, but also the after, falling asleep with Grace curled around her, Dani’s head on her chest. Waking up to Grace’s ridiculous bedhead, and the precious minutes between sleep and wakefulness, when they could be lazy and sluggish and cling to each other for just a few seconds longer, as if the world wasn't dying around them.

But like the crocodile that followed Captain Hook, the team working on their one-way time travel device were getting ever-closer to unlocking the secret, racing against Legion. Grace knew _someone_ needed to go back to protect Dani, and she’d volunteered herself dozens of times, though the Commander had always answered with, “We’ll see.”

The parts that she didn't say made shame settle heavy over her shoulders; a lead blanket that sometimes made it feel impossible to breath. Grace hadn’t asked, and likely considered the worst case a strong possibility… but Dani _knew_ what would happen, to whoever went back. That the Grace that would go back to save her would die in service to humanity, and despite all Dani's efforts to stop the world from reaching this point, it seemed ever clearer that the loop would proceed as she remembered it. For all the times Dani had stood up to her own death and defeated the odds, for all the stories people told about her leadership and integrity… She _couldn’t_ tell Grace what would happen. The words failed on her lips, every time.

Dani tore her eyes away from Grace when a synthetic log in the fire _popped_ loudly, and when she looked back, sleep-reddened blue eyes were blinking open and sharpening with consciousness.

“Hey,” greeted the Commander, and to her relief, her voice was much warmer than her thoughts.

“Hey. What are you doing over there?”

Shrugging, Dani pushed herself to her feet and shuffled toward the bed. “Couldn’t sleep. Engines are loud tonight.”

“I can’t believe _I_ slept,” muttered Grace, sitting up and rolling her neck. “I need to talk to Chopra about my cocktail."

“You deserved a good sleep. Snored a little, though. Thought they would've fixed that with the upgrades.” The joke was weak, but Dani knew that it was much better than throwing off hints of her stormy thoughts. 

Grace, of course, just grinned up at her, teeth gleaming in the fire, in a way that was absurdly contrary to her status as an apex killer, and Dani felt heat pull at the back of her eyes. The blonde’s brow furrowed immediately, and the smile faded, but she was already rolling closer, hand outstretched to grip Dani's fingertips, as if being physically closer could solve whatever problem she sensed. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. Other than the usual. Impending total annihilation.” Dani sniffed, and she let Grace tug her down into the bed, resting her head against the taller woman's shoulder.

“Mmm. Well… might I suggest that you let me distract you, for a little while?”

The Commander’s mood was dour enough that she almost protested, but Grace pulled her into her lap, kissing along her jaw as her hands dropped to stroke across Dani’s thighs.

Despite the passing years, Dani still hadn't found the answers to questions of fate, and free choice, or destiny. But she did know that to give up, or put the individual over the species, would be a waste of all the sacrifice that had brought them to this precipice. So she put Mexico City, 2019, out of her mind, and she relaxed against Grace’s muscular chest, to live fully in the momentary peace, despite the stakes. _Hay más tiempo que vida._

**Author's Note:**

> yell at me on tumblr [@trashyeggroll](http://trashyeggroll.tumblr.com)


End file.
